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spc with Isabelle

2006-09-5 @ 10:33

The Self Portrait Challenge for this month is “with someone”. Someone special, meaningful to my life. This would have been a picture of me with Isabelle.

with Isabelle

Isabelle passed away in November 2004, nearly two years ago. Lately, I’ve been feeling the loss a lot. Took myself off work for a few weeks while I struggle with this new phase of grief, with this pain. As someone once said, it is never over, it just gets easier.

I took this picture in the living room of our appartment; we lived here for three years, we chose this place together. I must confess that I rarely go to the cemetery. This is where I feel closest to her, not by a stone where her ashes are buried. I feel she is with me in this appartment; not as a ghost or spirit, but as a part of my life. There are so many memories we used to share that only I have now. She opened my life to new worlds. She was life. She lived to create, to give, to help. There are so many things I would like to say about her, but, these days, it is so very difficult.

She is gone. And those of us who knew her can only carry on her legacy and keep her memory alive.

(p.s. yes, those are smurfs; both of us always had this childish side to us).

8 comments to “spc with Isabelle”

  1. What a beautiful tribute. I can see her in your heart.

  2. this is a beautiful tribute.

  3. this is really so very touching.

  4. This is so beautiful. I hope your heart can find peace. Thank you for introducing us to her.

  5. I’m sorry to read of your loss, Isabelle seems very close to the surface in your words and portrait. A doctor once told me that grief is not linear, something I still find strangely comforting when that sharp sense of loss and pain returns after feeling “normal” for a time. Wishing you peace.

  6. I am feeling for you so much. I just cried a bucket of tears and posted today about losing my son three years ago this month. I am also having a really hard time of it right now. I think this picture is so fitting. You are just doing your “Normal” but she isn’t there to do normal with you…very moving photo.

  7. Thank you. That is all that I can say. Thank you. Things are, I think, slowly getting better, the hard way. It is strange to cry and to feel like your insides are being thorn apart, yet know that through this, I’m getting better…

  8. Sometimes you hit a post that takes your breath away. Thanks for taking mine.

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