Creuset of Ideas
» Oblivious



2006-01-26 @ 3:08

I confess, I watched the auditions for American Idol. One of those guilty pleasures I guess, watching someone make an ass of themselves. But what I find most interesting is seeing people who are so convinced they’re good – even though they have absolutely no talent. Oblivious: that is what they are. They cannot see, cannot comprehend that they’re not good. It just doesn’t register.

For me, one of the worst problem these days (as I cannot judge for days I weren’t there) is not so much that there are evil or stupid people, but the oblivious ones. It is really a widespread problem (may explain why Homer is so popular: he is the epitome of obliviousness). I mean, sure, we’re all oblivious in one area or another. It’s when it’s about “socially important” things that it gets to be a real problem. Elections are a good time to see social obliviousness in action. People usually vote on one thing (e.g. time to change the government, forced mergers), completely closed to other considerations.

As a nation – bear in mind, this is not aimed at the individuals, but at the way public opinion behaves (or is manipulated) – the United States are a good example of obliviousness, for instance regarding the source of terrorism (“They’re jealous!”),

But what I find particularly disturbing is when I see obliviousness in relationships. A very dear and sweet friend of mine is stuck with an ex-boyfriend (they’ve got a kid together) who just doesn’t understand. Things simply don’t register. Although he is an intelligent, intuitive (in some ways) and nice guy, in many ways, when it comes to his relationship with his ex, he’s pretty much like Homer (I wouldn’t be surprised to hear him say, “It takes two to lie. One to lie and one to listen.”). The kind who thinks that simply because he doesn’t go spend his nights drinking with his buddies, he’s a good boyfriend.

For more than six years, she tried to make him understand what is wrong, and how he doesn’t recognizes her need, and he just doesn’t see it. This is a man who says such thing to his son that will probably land to kid in therapy (the mildest being, “If your mom leaves me, I’m gonna leave the province and you won’t have a father.” In other words, I don’t care for you if I can have your mom.). And for him, there is nothing wrong with that – and that’s if he even remember saying it.

[Sorry about this one but people who hurt those I love really piss me off.]

I have this feeling that what is at the source of most of our problems, in relationship as well as in the world, is this lack of awareness. And one of the big problem with that is that when you’re oblivious, you just can’t see that there’s something you’re not aware of.

What do you think?